Supernatural_Quotes_Season1

Dean: Besides a whole new level of frustration, no. I'v looked at everything. A few local women, a Luara and a Cathryn, commited suicide in front of a mirror and a gaint mirror fell on a guy named Dave, but no Mary.

Charlie: I heard her say it. But it couldn't be because of that. I'm insane, right?

Dean: No, your not insane.

Charlie: That makes me feel so much worse.

Dean: Do I look like Paris Hilton? *grins*

Officer: Who are you

Dean: I'm the bosses kid.

Officer: You're Mr. Yamashiro's kid?

**Time passes**

Dean: Like I said...I was adopted.

Dean: Sammy! Sammy!

Sam: It's Sam.

Dean: Hey Sam...

Sam: Yeah?

Dean: This has got to be what? 600 years bad luck?

Episode List

Skin

Dean: Alright i figure Tucuman by lunch and then head south and arrive in Bissbee by midnight. And Sam wears women's underware...

Sam: I'm listening.

Dean: So you lie to them.

Sam: No, I just don't tell them everything.

Dean: Yeah...that's called lying. I mean, hey man, telling them the truth is way worse...

Sam: Hey Becky, can we have those beers now?

Rebbeca: Sure.

Sam: And some sandwhichs too...

Rebbeca: What do you think this is? Hooters?

Dean: Oh how I wish...

Dean: Alright, but first we're going to find that hansome devil and kick the holy crap out of him.

Sam: We have no weapons; no silver bullets.

Dean: Sam, the guy is walking around with my face. It's kind of personal. I want to find him.

Dean: Ya know. I'm gatta say-I'm sorry I'm ganna miss it...

Sam: Miss what?Dean: Having the chance I'm not ganna have to see my own funeral.

Episode List

Hook Man

Dean: Your half-caf double-vanilla latte is getting cold over her francis.

Sam: Bite me.

Dean: I told him you were a dumb-ass pledge and we were hazing you.

Sam: What about the shot gun?

Dean: I said you were hunting ghosts and the spirts were repelled by rock salt. you know-typical hell week prank.

Sam: And he believed you?

Dean: Well, you look like a dumb-ass pledge.

Sam: Hey, be quiet!

Dean: You be quiet!

Sam: You be quiet!

Episode List

Bugs

Sam: You know we could get day jobs once in a while.

Dean: Hunting is our day job and the pay is crap.

Sam: Yeah, but hustling pool, credit card scams...it's not the most honest thing in the world, Dean.

Dean: Well, lets see: honest, fun and easy...it's no contest. Besides, we're good at it; it's what we were raised to do.

Sam: Well, how we were raised was jacked.

Dean: Yeah. says you.

Dean: Mad cow? Wasn't that on Oprah?

Sam: You watch Oprah!?

Dean: So, you found some beetles...in a hole in the ground...that's shocking, Sam.

Lary: Let me just say: We accept homeowners of any race, religion, color, or sexual orientation.

Dean: We're brothers..

Linda: Let me just say: We accept homeowners of any race, religion, color, or sexual orientaion.

Dean: Right. I'm ganna go talk to Lary Okay honney? (Slaps Sam's ass)

Dean: Well, maybe sometimes he had to raise his voice, but you were out-of line.

Sam: Right. Right, like when I said I rather play soccer than learn bow hunting.

Dean: Bow hunting's an important skill.

Sam: Whatever.

Episode List

Home

Dean: Hey! Am I boring you with this hunting evil stuff?

Sam: No, I'm listening.

Sam: I have these nightmares...

Dean: I'v noticed.

Sam: And sometimes they come true.

Dean: Come again?

Missouri: Well, let me take a look at ya. You boys grew up hansome..And you(points at Dean0 were one goofy looking kid!

Missouri: Boy, you put your foot on my coffee table I'm ganna wack you with a spoon!

Dean: I didn't do anything!

Missouri: But you were thinking about it.

Episode List

Asylum

Sam: You think Dad is texting us?

Dean: He's given us coorinates before.

Sam: The man can barley work a toaster, Dean!

Dean: Shoved me pretty hard in there buddy boy.

Sam: Had to sell it didn't I? It's called method acting.

Dean: Huh?

Sam: Nevermind.

Dean: let me know if you see any dead people Hailey Joel.

Dean: who do you think is a hotter pyschic: Trisha Arcet, Jennifer Lover Hewitt, or you>

Dean: See that attitude right there. that is why I always go the extra cookie.

Sam: Did she hurt you?

Gavin: What? No. She...uh...

Sam: She what?

Gavin: She kissed me.

Sam: But she didn't hurt you?

Gavin: Dude she kissed me-I'm scarred for life.

Sam: It's kind of our job.

Kat: Who would pick a job like that?

Sam: Well, I had a crappy guidance counelor.

Dean: you're not going to try and kill me or anything, are you?

Sam: No...

Dean: Good, cuz that would be awkward.

Episode List

Scarecrow

Sam: You trust a shady van guy and not me?

Meg: Definately.

Dean: Dude you're fugly.

Emily: I don't understand. They're going to kills us?

Dean: Sacrifice. Which is, I don't know..classier, I guess.

Dean: I hope your apple pie is freaking worth it!

Dean: Hold me Sam, that was beautiful!

Sam: You should be kissing my ass! You were dead meat!

Episode List

Faith

Dean: That fabric softener teddy bear-I'm ganna hunt that little b*tch down.

Dean: I'm not ganna die in a hospital when the nurses aren't even hot.

Episode List

Route 666

Sam: By "old friend" you mean...

Dean: A friend that is not new.

Dean: So, this killer truck...

Sam: I miss conversations that didnt start with "this killer truck."

Sam: Where are you?

Dean: I'm in the middle of no-where with a killer truck up my ass!

Sam: When spirts cross over hallowed ground sometimes they're destroyed so I figured..maybe that would get rid of it.

Dean: Maybe? Maybe!? What if you were wrong!?

Sam: Huh...honestly that thought hadn't occured to me...

Dean: The thought hadn't occured to him...I'm ganna kill him.

Episode List

Nightmare

Sam: Well, I know one thing I have in common with these people.

Dean: What's that?

Sam: Both our families are cursed.

Dean: Our family's not cursed. We just have our dark spots...

Sam: Our dark spots are pretty dark.

Dean: You're dark...

Max: Nothing says "I'm sorry" like a tuna cassorole.

Dean: Then what? Hand him over to the cops and say, "Lock him up officer; he kills with the power of his mind."?

Sam: Aren't you worried?

Dean: Nope. No way. You know why?

Sam: No, why?

Dean: Cuz you got one thing that Max didn't have.

Sam: Dad? Cuz Dad's not here, Dean.

Dean: No, me. As long as I'm around nothing bad's ganna happen.

Dean: Now then, I know what we need to do about your premonitions. I know where we need to go.

Sam: Where?

Dean: Vegas.

Episode List

The Benders

Mother: Tell the officers what you were watching on TV.

Child: Godzilla vs Mothra.

Dean: That's my favorite Godzlla movie. So much better than the origional, huh?

Child: Totally.

Dean: Yeah, he likes the remake.

Child: Yuck!

Sam: We should get an early start.

Dean: You really know how to have fun don't cha grandma?

Kathleen: Does your cousin have a drinking problem?

Dean: Sam? Two beers and he's doing karaoke...

Dean: Yeah..Dean, kind of the black sheep of the family. Hansome though.

Kathleen: It says here that your badge was stolen, and here's a picture of you.

Dean: I lost some wight..and I have that Michael Jackson skin disease.

Dean: I'll say it again- Demons I get; People are crazy.

Dean: This is what this is about? You yahoos hunt people!?

Dean: If I tell you will you promise not to make me into an ashtray?

Father: There's something I need to know...

Dean: How about it's not nice to marry your sister.

Dean: Eat me. Oh wait, no. You acutally might.

Episode List

Shadow

Dean: You know I gatta say, Dad made it just fine without these stupid costumes. I feel like a high-school drama dork.

Owner: Well, no offense, but your alarm is about as useful as boobs on a man.

Dean: So I talked to the bartender.

Sam: Did you get anything..besides her number?

Dean: Dude, I'm a professional...I'm offended that you would...alrightly*holds up napkin*

Dean: So, to recap: The only successful intel we scored is the bartender's phone number.

Dean: *cough/clears throat*

Meg: Dude, cover your mouth!

Sam: Yeah, I'm sorry. Meg, this is my brother, Dean.

Meg: This is Dean?

Dean: Yeah, so you've heard of me?

Meg: Oh yeah...I'v heard of you. Nice, how you treat your brother like luggage.

Dean: So what was she saying? I treat you like luggage? What, were you b*tching about me 2 some chick?

Sam: Look, I'm sorry-it was when we had that huge fight.

Sam: There is something about thisgirl that I can't quite put my finger on...

Dean: Yeah, but I'd bet you'd like to.

Sam: Bite me...

Dean: Oh no. bite her. But don't leave teeth marks, but just...

Dean: So Sammy's got a thing for the bad girl...

Sam: Wanna have fun? Go ahead, then. I'm a little tied up right now...

Dean: Hey Sam, the next time you want to get laid, find a girl that's not so buckets of crazy.

Episode List

Hell Hou se

Sam: We're not going to start that crap up again.

Dean: Start what up?

Sam: That stupid prant stuff-it's stupid and it always escalates.

Dean: Aww, what's the matter Sammy-afraid your going to get a little nair in your shampoo again?

Sam: Alright, just remeber you started it.

Dean: Oh, bring it on baldy.

Dean: Man, I hate rats.

Sam: You rather it was a ghost?

Dean: Yes.

Dean: I thought the legend said that Mordechai only goes after chicks.

Sam: It does.

Dean: I mean, that explains why it went after you, but me...

Sam: Hilarious.

Dean: People believe in Santa Clause. How come I'm not getting hooked up every Christmas?

Sam: Thats because you're a bad person.

Ed: WWBD. What would Buffy do?

Harry: I know Ed, but she's stronger than me.

Sam: I have a confession to make.

Dean: What's that?

Sam: I was the one who called them and tolf them I was a producer.

Dean: Well, I'm the one who put the dead fish in their back seat.

Episode List

Something Wicked

Dean: I'm sure there is something worth killing in Fitchburg.

Sam: Yeah? What makes you so sure?

Dean: Well, cuz I'm the oldest, which means I'm always right.

Sam: No it doesn't.

Dean: Yeah, it totally does.

Sam: Dude, I'm not using this ID!

Dean: Why not?

Sam: Because it says 'Bikini Inspector' on it.

Michael: King or two queens?

Dean: Two queens.

Michael: Yeah, I bet...

Dean: What'd you say?

Michael: Nice car..

Dean: When we were there I saw a patient, an old woman.

Sam: An old person, huh? In a hospital? We better call the coast guard.

Episode List

Provenance

Sam: So what are we today, Dean? Are we rockstars, army rangers...

Dean: We are LA TV scous looking for people with "special skills." But hey, it's not that far off, right?

Sam: Art history course. It's good for meeting girls.

Dean: It's like I don't even know you.

Dean: Well, we're not getting anything out of chuckles, but Sarah...

Sam: Maybe you can get her to write it all down on a cocktail napkin...

Dean: not me.

Sam: No, no, no. Pic-ups are your thing.

Dean: Hey, it wasn't my but she was checking out.

Dean: And...

Sam: And nothing. That's it, I left.

Dean: You didn't have to con her or do her any "special favors" pr anything..

Sam: Dean, would you get your mind out of the gutter?

Sam: I dont understand, we burned the damn thing!

Dean: Yeah, thank you captin obvious!

Sam: What do you mena like a Da Vinci code deal?

Dean: I dont now...I'm still waiting for the movie on that one.

Dean: Sam, marry that girl.

Sam: What ind of house doesn't have any salt? Low-sodium freaks!

Episode List

Dead Man's Blood

Sam: Hey there's salt over here.

Dean: You mean like protection against evil salt or " whoops I spilled the popcorn" salt?

Dean: Vampires. Gets funnier everytime I hear it.

Sam: Hey Dad, what ever happened to tahat college fund?

John: I spent it on ammo.

Dean: All do respect, but that's a bunch of crap.

John: Excuse me?

Dean: You know what Sammy and I have been hunting. Hell, you sent us on a few hunting trips yourself. You can't be that worried about keeping us safe.

Episode List

Salvation

Nurse: Hi sir. Anthing I can do for you?

Dean: Oh God yes. Bt I'm working right now...

John: All right, when were you going to tell me about this?

Dean: We didn't know what it meant.

John: When something like this starts happening to your brother you pick up the phone and you call me.

Dean: Call you? You kidding me? I called you from Lawerence. Sam called you when I was dying. Getting you on the phone-I got a better chance of winning the lottery.

Meg: You shot me! I can't believe you just shot me!!

Demon: It's a fake.

Meg: I'm so not in the mood for this-I'v just been shot!

John: Well, I guess you're lucky the gun wasn't real.

Meg: That was funny, John. We're going to strip the skin from your bones, but that was funny.